sonia: Quilted wall-hanging (Default)
[personal profile] sonia
The pandemic has given me the habit of stocking up when I can get things, and not necessarily expecting them to be around later. It has made me hesitate less on some purchases, which I'm not sure is a good thing.

There's a local clothing seller I've been buying from for years in person. Lovely batik fabrics made in Bali, nice range of sizes. Their shop is gone, but I found a somewhat hinky-looking website with their name and photos of the right clothes. Last Thursday, I decided to go ahead and order, with misgivings, by sending money via PayPal with a list of what I wanted.

I didn't hear anything back, and started feeling ashamed of being scammed. I pulled out of that spiral and messaged the seller via Facebook (occasionally useful!) the next day. She said sorry she's not selling anymore and she could give me a refund. But no refund arrived. I contacted her again after the weekend, but she didn't reply.

I reluctantly opened a PayPal dispute yesterday. I have nothing against that seller, but I think someone else took over her domain and is scamming people like me who trusted her. One downside of the Wayback Machine - it lets people do things like that.

Then I got a notice from my credit union that the account I linked to PayPal was overdrawn and I had been charged $33. Augh! I KNOW I made the transfer to cover the payment, and it shows me logged in to the banking site just before I made the PayPal payment, but somehow it didn't go through. Again, I felt really ashamed, and then backed out of it. It would be unfortunate to be charged even more for a purchase that didn't happen, but it's not a disaster.

I sent the credit union a message saying I was surprised the transfer didn't go through, here are screenshots of my login history and the PayPal transaction. They reversed the fee for me, yay! I always feel a little bad about things like that, because people with less privilege (writing skills, screenshot skills, expectation/hope of being accommodated) would end up paying the high fee instead.

I think PayPal will return the original payment to me as well. They say they've returned it provisionally, although that's a little confused by the bank rejecting the debit. This is exactly the situation their buyer protection is made for. ETA: Paypal did return my money.

It's easier not to go into a shame spiral when I know I have the resources to cover being scammed if needed, although in this case it looks like it's all going to even out, with an ultimate cost of some time and stress. I'm proud that I was able to take steps despite feeling panic. I'm proud that my communication was calm and not blaming with anyone, including myself. Which is good, since the first thing PayPal did with the dispute I wrote up is send it to the seller!

Anyway, if anyone knows a seller of clothes made with Balinese batiks in larger sizes, I need a new source.

Date: 2021-08-05 02:35 pm (UTC)
silveradept: A kodama with a trombone. The trombone is playing music, even though it is held in a rest position (Default)
From: [personal profile] silveradept
Good on being able to dispute things successfully and avoid the charges, with extra "happiness" about dealing with a system designed to make someone pay exorbitant fees if there's ever the possibility their balance will go into the negative, so that they stay in the negative forever because of the fees.

It certainly makes the idea of outlawing any kind of usury very attractive.
Edited Date: 2021-08-05 02:35 pm (UTC)

Date: 2021-08-05 03:05 pm (UTC)
minoanmiss: A Minoan-style drawing of an octopus (Octopus)
From: [personal profile] minoanmiss
If I find such a source I will absolutely let you know.
Good job evading the shame spiral and handling this well!

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sonia: Quilted wall-hanging (Default)
Sonia Connolly

June 2025

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