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Hi! If you're here for the public links and stories, happy browsing! I also added a music tag.
I love getting comments! Please no "shoulds" or "why don't you just".
Happy to give access to folks who can read and comment with kindness. Let me know if you're interested.
It's always access-change Amnesty Day around here. If you want to stop having access, I can take you back off, no questions asked. Likewise, I may change my reading/access list if I can't cope with something, with no implied judgments.
I wrote some books about healing from trauma!
Wellspring of Compassion: Self-Care for Sensitive People Healing from Trauma
Welcome to support and comfort whether you are new to healing or an old hand, whether the trauma is long past or ongoing.
Presence After Trauma: Reconcile with Your Self and the World
This book is a non-judgmental companion for your healing process after the initial crisis is over.
Embodying Hope: Living in Difficult Times with a Difficult Past
We embody hope when we keep moving forward, one stubborn step after another, and when we take shelter for protection and rest.
How to make a post sticky, for future reference, and anyone else who's wondering.
Happy Imbolc!
Feb. 1st, 2026 09:17 pmMy plan today was to get a 20 lb bag of rice from the local farmers market, and then take BART to the other side of the hills and bike "the three bears" aka Bear Creek loop. However, the rice vendor said they didn't send him any big bags of rice this week, and I saw on the BART website that they were trimming vegetation between the two BART stations I needed and single-tracking the trains, so I didn't want to do that.
Instead, I decided to bike to 99 Ranch the long way (over Grizzly Peak) and get rice there. I texted a friend who lives up that way that I would get there approx 1:30 and did he want to meet up. It was a gorgeous day for a ride, sunny and just warm enough not to need a jacket.
Biking over the hill and seeing the flowering plum and cherry and magnolia trees is a touchpoint of the year for me. I was distressed last year that I missed spring hill rides entirely because of my injured ankle, so it was a treat to see all the flowering trees today, even if February 1 seems unreasonably early.
My friend and I texted each other updates from our respective journeys and did manage to meet up. I got to 99 Ranch at 1:28 after 2 1/2 hours of riding, so I was pleased about estimating accurately (without a mapping app). I got a 20 lb bag of rice for $12.50 instead of $40 at the farmers market, with the cost of a long beautiful ride and hauling it home (the flat way) for 7 miles. I'll take it!
I also spotted some Sterilite ClearView plastic storage drawers on the sidewalk with a FREE sign when I was fairly near home. They were the old style ones similar to the ones I have. I had looked for more online and now they only sell stacked units, not single ones. So I stopped and picked one up and strapped it to the back rack. I'll have to scrub the top of it, but it's nice to find something that's not available in stores.
Happy Imbolc to all!
Instead, I decided to bike to 99 Ranch the long way (over Grizzly Peak) and get rice there. I texted a friend who lives up that way that I would get there approx 1:30 and did he want to meet up. It was a gorgeous day for a ride, sunny and just warm enough not to need a jacket.
Biking over the hill and seeing the flowering plum and cherry and magnolia trees is a touchpoint of the year for me. I was distressed last year that I missed spring hill rides entirely because of my injured ankle, so it was a treat to see all the flowering trees today, even if February 1 seems unreasonably early.
My friend and I texted each other updates from our respective journeys and did manage to meet up. I got to 99 Ranch at 1:28 after 2 1/2 hours of riding, so I was pleased about estimating accurately (without a mapping app). I got a 20 lb bag of rice for $12.50 instead of $40 at the farmers market, with the cost of a long beautiful ride and hauling it home (the flat way) for 7 miles. I'll take it!
I also spotted some Sterilite ClearView plastic storage drawers on the sidewalk with a FREE sign when I was fairly near home. They were the old style ones similar to the ones I have. I had looked for more online and now they only sell stacked units, not single ones. So I stopped and picked one up and strapped it to the back rack. I'll have to scrub the top of it, but it's nice to find something that's not available in stores.
Happy Imbolc to all!
A good day - until I looked at the news
Jan. 24th, 2026 09:40 pmI had a good day today. Biked to the farmer's market, and then went to the new year's party at my gym. I didn't know gyms had parties, but this one was fun. Friendly people, and several bodyworkers offering free 20 min sessions (I got a massage!) and free drinks from the cafe next door.
I biked over to the ad hoc Balkan and Georgian singing group that meets once a month, and we successfully sang a bunch of songs, even ones that were newer to us or that we hadn't sung in a while, like Tsmindao Ghmerto. Felt great!
Then I got home and caught up on the news. Augh! Via![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
redbird, I was reminded about the Stand With Minnesota site with lots of organizations we can support to help their anti-ICE effort. I donated some money to Just The Pill.
Adding Minnesota Indian Women's Resource Center viaofearthandstars in comments. They are listed under Organizations Doing Work On The Ground.
On the plus side, I'm so glad we are collectively screaming about ICE, not just passively letting it happen. So grateful for the people bearing witness, physically resisting, and sending support from afar.
I biked over to the ad hoc Balkan and Georgian singing group that meets once a month, and we successfully sang a bunch of songs, even ones that were newer to us or that we hadn't sung in a while, like Tsmindao Ghmerto. Felt great!
Then I got home and caught up on the news. Augh! Via
redbird, I was reminded about the Stand With Minnesota site with lots of organizations we can support to help their anti-ICE effort. I donated some money to Just The Pill.Adding Minnesota Indian Women's Resource Center via
ofearthandstars in comments. They are listed under Organizations Doing Work On The Ground.On the plus side, I'm so glad we are collectively screaming about ICE, not just passively letting it happen. So grateful for the people bearing witness, physically resisting, and sending support from afar.
There is a general strike called for Friday January 23 in Minnesota. Stay home from work if it feels right, and definitely don't cross any picket lines, including the electronic ones of shopping at big corporations like Amazon, etc. (if you can avoid it).
From my union:
"This is a verified page fundraising support for the Minneapolis Regional Labor Federation, AFL-CIO and Working Partnerships' 2026 rapid response effort to meet the needs of impacted union members, worker center members, and their families..."
https://workingpartnerships.betterworld.org/campaigns/support-impacted-union-families
Here is how you can help:
Posts bynaomikritzer
How to help if you are outside Minnesota.
She covers a variety of topics, including how to start preparing for if and when this shit comes to your home state, and the suggestion to talk About immigration, and make it clear you think it’s GOOD.
If you are in Minnesota.
From my union:
"This is a verified page fundraising support for the Minneapolis Regional Labor Federation, AFL-CIO and Working Partnerships' 2026 rapid response effort to meet the needs of impacted union members, worker center members, and their families..."
https://workingpartnerships.betterworld.org/campaigns/support-impacted-union-families
Here is how you can help:
Posts by
naomikritzerHow to help if you are outside Minnesota.
She covers a variety of topics, including how to start preparing for if and when this shit comes to your home state, and the suggestion to talk About immigration, and make it clear you think it’s GOOD.
If you are in Minnesota.
Link: Boss, it's the fascism
Jan. 19th, 2026 07:56 pmI saw this go by on Mastodon, and it stayed with me, so I'm reposting it from Tumblr by ![[tumblr.com profile]](https://www.tumblr.com/favicon.ico)
nitewrighter. (First few comments are worth reading.)
Me: I don't get it. I thought I was doing a lot better than I was a few years ago. I'm like 10 times more on top of things than I used to be. How does everything feel terrible now?
The Tiny Me in OSHA-approved Hi-Vis Gear Who lives in my brain and pulls all the levers: Boss, it's the fascism. You're completely gunked up with cortisol due to the fact that your entire daily life is now underscored with a haunting awareness of the rapid erosion of your rights, dignity, and any and all social safety nets, and you're also bearing witness to the most vulnerable people immediately being persecuted. This creates a natural stress response that basically means you're going to continue having memory and organizational problems, as well as emotional imbalances.
Me: BUT I HAVE A BULLET JOURNAL AND I MEDITATE NOW.
Tiny OSHA Me: BOSS, THE FASCISM.
Run your massage therapy practice so that people aren't relieved (as well as pissed) when you stand them up.
( Nope nope nope )
When we were first discussing schedules, she offered to refer me out, which I did appreciate, except one of her referrals was someone I've already seen who wasn't a great fit for me, and the other is someone I traded with over 20 years ago who's connected with my very estranged ex. Fortunately she's way up in the hills, so I could use that as an excuse for saying she's not a good fit.
( Nope nope nope )
When we were first discussing schedules, she offered to refer me out, which I did appreciate, except one of her referrals was someone I've already seen who wasn't a great fit for me, and the other is someone I traded with over 20 years ago who's connected with my very estranged ex. Fortunately she's way up in the hills, so I could use that as an excuse for saying she's not a good fit.
How to Temporarily Disable Face ID or Touch ID, and Require a Passcode to Unlock Your iPhone or iPad by John Gruber.
Just press and hold the buttons on both sides. Remember that. Try it now. Don’t just memorize it, internalize it, so that you’ll be able to do it without much thought while under duress, like if you’re confronted by a police officer. Remember to do this every time you’re separated from your phone, like when going through the magnetometer at any security checkpoint, especially airports. As soon as you see a metal detector ahead of you, you should think, “Hard-lock my iPhone”.
I'm training for a 100K bike ride in April, so I'm going out on long hilly rides on the weekends. The weather has been delightfully sunny and warm (if a bit odd for January), and they've mostly been great rides.
However, people seem to assume they need to cheer me on. Maybe because I'm a woman, or because I'm not skinny, or because I climb hills slowly, but I do get there.
Half way up Spruce St., a woman waiting to pull out from a side street in her car gives me two big thumbs up as I approached. I smiled and kept biking. That would have been fine. But she rolls down the window and says, "You can do it!" I said, "This is only the thousandth time I've climbed this hill." She was smiling and nodding, and then her face fell as I said "thousandth," probably because she was assuming I would say, "first." Maybe she won't make as many assumptions next time.
Then, getting close to the top, a couple of guys pass me on mountain bikes and one of them says, "Good job!" I said, "You too!" After all, we had both climbed the same hill to the same point. He looked surprised, because young men get to congratulate middle-aged women, but not the other way around.
Yesterday I biked up the hill, down the far side, and then back up. At the corner of Grizzly Peak and Claremont (the beginning of the steep fast descent out of the hills), there is often a Mexican produce stand, and I like to stop there for fruit, even if it tends to end up bruised on the ride down. This time I bought pistachios and mandarins, and they did better on the descent.
When I rode up, there was an older white dude arguing about his total in Spanish with the young Mexican woman staffing the stand. They started over counting it all up and it turns out she was right (surprising me not at all). He said something about buying fruit for his friend with the nasty flu, and I said I was keeping my distance then. He said, "I didn't touch him or anything."
He had been over on the seller's side of the table, and now he came around and said, "Nice bike." I thanked him and answered his questions about it. At this point he's touching the handlebars and standing quite close to me, blocking my way forward. I paid the seller and said, "Excuse me please." He said, "Why do you have to be so rude?" I said, "I need to go home." He said, "You're being rude!" I sighed and backed up the bike to get out of there. He said, "Why do you have to be so American?" as I rode away.
Reminds me of the time a guy on a bike stopped me to ask for directions on a dark rainy night in Portland. I'm generally willing to help, but it was a wide, empty street and he stood too close and blocked my way, at which point I similarly said, "Excuse me" and biked around him. He called after me, "Don't go! I need help!" Which he may have, but he wasn't going to get it with threatening body language. He had a European-sounding accent and maybe it was ignorance of American personal space, but I wasn't going to ignore my spidey-sense to find out.
This dude at the fruit stand spoke unaccented English, so I don't know if he's from somewhere with less personal space, but I don't think I was the one being rude. I guess wherever he's from, he gets to touch other people's (women's) stuff and take up as much time as he wants.
However, people seem to assume they need to cheer me on. Maybe because I'm a woman, or because I'm not skinny, or because I climb hills slowly, but I do get there.
Half way up Spruce St., a woman waiting to pull out from a side street in her car gives me two big thumbs up as I approached. I smiled and kept biking. That would have been fine. But she rolls down the window and says, "You can do it!" I said, "This is only the thousandth time I've climbed this hill." She was smiling and nodding, and then her face fell as I said "thousandth," probably because she was assuming I would say, "first." Maybe she won't make as many assumptions next time.
Then, getting close to the top, a couple of guys pass me on mountain bikes and one of them says, "Good job!" I said, "You too!" After all, we had both climbed the same hill to the same point. He looked surprised, because young men get to congratulate middle-aged women, but not the other way around.
Yesterday I biked up the hill, down the far side, and then back up. At the corner of Grizzly Peak and Claremont (the beginning of the steep fast descent out of the hills), there is often a Mexican produce stand, and I like to stop there for fruit, even if it tends to end up bruised on the ride down. This time I bought pistachios and mandarins, and they did better on the descent.
When I rode up, there was an older white dude arguing about his total in Spanish with the young Mexican woman staffing the stand. They started over counting it all up and it turns out she was right (surprising me not at all). He said something about buying fruit for his friend with the nasty flu, and I said I was keeping my distance then. He said, "I didn't touch him or anything."
He had been over on the seller's side of the table, and now he came around and said, "Nice bike." I thanked him and answered his questions about it. At this point he's touching the handlebars and standing quite close to me, blocking my way forward. I paid the seller and said, "Excuse me please." He said, "Why do you have to be so rude?" I said, "I need to go home." He said, "You're being rude!" I sighed and backed up the bike to get out of there. He said, "Why do you have to be so American?" as I rode away.
Reminds me of the time a guy on a bike stopped me to ask for directions on a dark rainy night in Portland. I'm generally willing to help, but it was a wide, empty street and he stood too close and blocked my way, at which point I similarly said, "Excuse me" and biked around him. He called after me, "Don't go! I need help!" Which he may have, but he wasn't going to get it with threatening body language. He had a European-sounding accent and maybe it was ignorance of American personal space, but I wasn't going to ignore my spidey-sense to find out.
This dude at the fruit stand spoke unaccented English, so I don't know if he's from somewhere with less personal space, but I don't think I was the one being rude. I guess wherever he's from, he gets to touch other people's (women's) stuff and take up as much time as he wants.
Link: Kaiser class action lawsuit
Jan. 16th, 2026 11:03 amI received a notice about this and checked it against classaction.org, so I think it's valid.
Visit www.KaiserPrivacySettlement.com to submit a claim.
Their website is god-awful slow to bring up a Next button when you enter your settlement number, to the point where I had tried it in two other browsers and called the phone number (no human available) before I went back and saw it had finally showed up.
Visit www.KaiserPrivacySettlement.com to submit a claim.
Their website is god-awful slow to bring up a Next button when you enter your settlement number, to the point where I had tried it in two other browsers and called the phone number (no human available) before I went back and saw it had finally showed up.
The parties in the lawsuit John Doe, et al. v. Kaiser Foundation Health Plan, Inc., et al., Case No. 3:23-cv-02865-EMC (N.D. Cal.) (“Action”) have reached a proposed settlement of claims (“Settlement”) in a pending class action against Kaiser Foundation Health Plan, Inc. (“Defendant”) and certain related entities. If approved, the Settlement will resolve this Action wherein Plaintiffs allege that Defendant’s websites and mobile applications disclosed their confidential personal information due to third-party software code. Plaintiffs allege that this code was embedded across Defendant’s platforms, including the secure patient portal, and transmitted information to third parties when users navigated these platforms. Defendant firmly denies the allegations, denying any liability or wrongdoing, and denies that Plaintiffs are entitled to any relief arising from this Action. Defendant also maintains that Plaintiffs have not suffered any damages arising from this Action.
Found in the street
Jan. 13th, 2026 09:41 pmOver the weekend, I was heading out on my bike early in the morning, and saw a small kid's book in the street just off the driveway. I picked it up to toss it to the sidewalk and went on my way.
When I got back, I was pleased to see it was gone, but then saw someone had propped it up on our fence. The next time I was going out, I took it with me and put it in the nearby Little Free Library, even though it mostly has grownup books.
When I was walking home, I ran into a couple with a two year old whom I often see walking up the block, and whom I had chatted with at a recent neighborhood gathering. I saw that the kid was happily clutching the book, and said, "Oh good, you picked it up!" They said he has been obsessed with that character.
Yesterday I was biking home from an appointment, and I saw a phone lying next to a parked car in the street. I pulled over, leaned my bike against a pole, and picked it up. It had a drivers license in the case with the address of the apartment building across the street. There was no way to get in or ring a doorbell at the gated front entrance, but there was a door open around the corner.
The people inside were noisily doing something which sounded kind of like having sex, laughing, maybe just roughhousing, but ... door open? I stood there hesitantly, and a maybe 8 year old kid inside gestured to the other people and they came out (dressed, whew). I said, "I'm so sorry to bother you, but this phone was in the street. Is this (building address)?" They said yes, and they recognized the name on the license and said she's at work. I turned the phone over to them.
I only realized later that it might be unsettling for a Black family to have a white lady come stand at the door. I'm glad I approached them with softness.
So that's two things put closer to where they belong, and hopefully a bad day averted for the phone's owner. Not sure how her phone ended up on the ground next to the driver's side door of a parked car if she's at work.
When I got back, I was pleased to see it was gone, but then saw someone had propped it up on our fence. The next time I was going out, I took it with me and put it in the nearby Little Free Library, even though it mostly has grownup books.
When I was walking home, I ran into a couple with a two year old whom I often see walking up the block, and whom I had chatted with at a recent neighborhood gathering. I saw that the kid was happily clutching the book, and said, "Oh good, you picked it up!" They said he has been obsessed with that character.
Yesterday I was biking home from an appointment, and I saw a phone lying next to a parked car in the street. I pulled over, leaned my bike against a pole, and picked it up. It had a drivers license in the case with the address of the apartment building across the street. There was no way to get in or ring a doorbell at the gated front entrance, but there was a door open around the corner.
The people inside were noisily doing something which sounded kind of like having sex, laughing, maybe just roughhousing, but ... door open? I stood there hesitantly, and a maybe 8 year old kid inside gestured to the other people and they came out (dressed, whew). I said, "I'm so sorry to bother you, but this phone was in the street. Is this (building address)?" They said yes, and they recognized the name on the license and said she's at work. I turned the phone over to them.
I only realized later that it might be unsettling for a Black family to have a white lady come stand at the door. I'm glad I approached them with softness.
So that's two things put closer to where they belong, and hopefully a bad day averted for the phone's owner. Not sure how her phone ended up on the ground next to the driver's side door of a parked car if she's at work.
"The Sick Times is an independent news site founded by journalists Betsy Ladyzhets and Miles Griffis. We report on the Long COVID crisis, COVID-19, and infection-associated illnesses." They redacted the excerpt I had linked here because they found the whole book engaged in Covid denial and promotion of harmful treatments for ME/CFS. (Thanks to silveradept for the heads up.)
Replacement link, by one of the editors at Sick Times: The Soft Butch That Couldn’t (Or: I Got COVID-19 in March 2020 and Never Got Better) by Heather Hogan.
(On a lighter note) 6th grader's science experiment answers, 'Do cat buttholes touch every surface they sit on?' by Jacalyn Wetzel, Upworthy staff.
A Culture of Resilience by Lindsey Foltz, a beautifully written and photographed exploration of home food preserving in Bulgaria.
What the World Got Wrong About Autistic People by Ludmila N. Praslova, Ph.D., SHRM-SCP viaandrewducker.
silveradept for the heads up.)Replacement link, by one of the editors at Sick Times: The Soft Butch That Couldn’t (Or: I Got COVID-19 in March 2020 and Never Got Better) by Heather Hogan.
(On a lighter note) 6th grader's science experiment answers, 'Do cat buttholes touch every surface they sit on?' by Jacalyn Wetzel, Upworthy staff.
The results? Turns out that, no, cat buttholes do not touch every surface cats sit on. Now, let's all take a collective sigh of relief while we go over the details.
A Culture of Resilience by Lindsey Foltz, a beautifully written and photographed exploration of home food preserving in Bulgaria.
[I]ndustrial and small-scale agriculture; cultivated and wild foods; formal and informal economies; leisure and work do not function as stark polarities but rather in interconnecting, mutually supportive relationships through which home preservers practice, develop, and share their craft. The entanglement of formal and informal economies, domestic and wild foods, smallholders and industrial farms, local and global influences visible in everyday food practices in Bulgaria specifically and Eastern Europe more broadly condense in household cellars. As the cellar tour I describe below illustrates, these uniquely social practices provide resilience in terms of food security and the ability to pursue something more than mere survival.
What the World Got Wrong About Autistic People by Ludmila N. Praslova, Ph.D., SHRM-SCP via
andrewducker.Prejudice is one reason decades of research got autism so wrong. Researchers measured autistic people against neurotypical expectations and called every difference a deficit. They tested empathy by measuring in-group preference and missed commitment to universal fairness. They measured creativity by counting the number of ideas and missed originality. They saw moral consistency and called it rigidity. They saw deep engagement and called it rigidity. They saw sensory richness and called it disorder.
Most critically, they failed to ask autistic people about their inner experiences. They studied autism without genuinely listening to the autistic perspective. For decades, science examined autistic people through a lens of pathology and deficit, rather than dignity, comparing us to animals while missing our humanity. But autistic people don't lack humanity. Research just lacked the humanity to see it.
Whole book: "Mutual Aid"
Jan. 11th, 2026 07:54 pmMutual Aid by Dean Spade is a whole book available online. Subtitle: Building Solidarity During This Crisis (and the Next).
I've only read a little bit of this, despite having it open in a tab for months. It feels hopeful, experienced, and direct, so I hope to read the rest eventually.
This book provides a concrete guide for building mutual aid groups and networks. Part I explores what mutual aid is, why it is different than charity, and how it relates to other social movement tactics. Part II dives into the nitty-gritty of how to work together in mutual aid groups and how to handle the challenges of group decision-making, conflict, and burnout. It includes charts and lists that can be brought to group meetings to stimulate conversation and build shared analysis and group practices. Ultimately, helps imagine how we can coordinate to collectively take care of ourselves—even in the face of disaster—and mobilize hundreds of millions of people to make deep and lasting change.
I've only read a little bit of this, despite having it open in a tab for months. It feels hopeful, experienced, and direct, so I hope to read the rest eventually.
Word of the Year: Love
Dec. 31st, 2025 05:19 pmMy word of the year this year was Love. It started out feeling huge and amorphous and flinchy, and settled into being a warm flow in the background. It feels like it gently soaked into some stuck places and loosened them.
batdina commented on last year's post that Marianne Williamson says love and fear are opposites, and for me they have been intertwined. It feels like over the past year they have gotten more unwound from each other. I'm grateful that it's been un-dramatic, and also a little sad that there hasn't been any movement toward a romantic relationship. I did ask a cute friend of a friend to dance at a concert, which was fun, but it turned out he's married.
One of the things that let Love settle into being warm and gentle rather than scary and dramatic is separating it from Desire. I'm warily choosing that as my word for 2026. Sexual desire can feel dangerously overpowering, both my own and other people's, and wanting things in general feels like it makes me vulnerable to manipulation and can get labeled greedy.
I started out this Word of the Year tradition choosing words I desperately needed, and the last few years I've more chosen things that I want to make my peace with, although looking at the list, I still need them. I think of Love as an underlying force in the Universe, and Desire as an underlying force of being alive. We move toward what we want, and away from what we don't want.
While I feel as clear as I ever do in this Word of the Year process that Desire is the next one, I also feel a strong pull away from it. Which is part of my relationship with Desire generally, a strong pull toward and an equally strong pull away.
( full word of the year list )
batdina commented on last year's post that Marianne Williamson says love and fear are opposites, and for me they have been intertwined. It feels like over the past year they have gotten more unwound from each other. I'm grateful that it's been un-dramatic, and also a little sad that there hasn't been any movement toward a romantic relationship. I did ask a cute friend of a friend to dance at a concert, which was fun, but it turned out he's married.One of the things that let Love settle into being warm and gentle rather than scary and dramatic is separating it from Desire. I'm warily choosing that as my word for 2026. Sexual desire can feel dangerously overpowering, both my own and other people's, and wanting things in general feels like it makes me vulnerable to manipulation and can get labeled greedy.
I started out this Word of the Year tradition choosing words I desperately needed, and the last few years I've more chosen things that I want to make my peace with, although looking at the list, I still need them. I think of Love as an underlying force in the Universe, and Desire as an underlying force of being alive. We move toward what we want, and away from what we don't want.
While I feel as clear as I ever do in this Word of the Year process that Desire is the next one, I also feel a strong pull away from it. Which is part of my relationship with Desire generally, a strong pull toward and an equally strong pull away.
( full word of the year list )
What I've been reading this year
Dec. 30th, 2025 10:03 pmLinks go to my book blog, Curious, Healing.
Bea Wolf by Zach Weinersmith and Boulet
The Serviceberry by Robin Wall Kimmerer
Somebody I used to Know by Wendy Mitchell
If the Buddha Married by Charlotte Kasl
Childhood's End by Arthur C. Clarke
Remarkably Bright Creatures by Shelby Van Pelt
The Fortunate Fall by Cameron Reed
Weaving Hope by Celia Lake
Alexandra's Riddle by Elisa Keyston
The Book of Love by Kelly Link
Surviving Domestic Violence by Elaine Weiss
Seaward by Susan Cooper
Very Far Away From Anywhere Else by Ursula K. Le Guin
Kitchens of Hope by Linda S. Svitak and Christin Jaye Eaton with Lee Svitak Dean
What It Takes to Heal by Prentis Hemphill
The Enchanted Greenhouse by Sarah Beth Durst
How We Show Up by Mia Birdsong
Currently reading "Hospicing Modernity" by Vanessa Machado de Oliveira Andreotti, which is a down-to-earth, practical manual on how to expand past the limitations that modernity puts on our thoughts, imagination, and experiences. The author talks directly about how difficult it is to address people's frozen assumptions without triggering defensiveness, while encouraging the reader to open up, side-step defensiveness, and explore wider possibilities.
I just got past the introductory exercises, which feel similar to the trauma-healing work I've been doing all this time. I always feel like I'm behind, trying to catch up to people who had more ordinary and loving childhoods but maybe those aren't so ordinary, and maybe all that work leaves me in a more flexible place.
Highly recommended! You can read a couple of sample chapters at decolonialfutures.net/hospicingmodernity
Bea Wolf by Zach Weinersmith and Boulet
The Serviceberry by Robin Wall Kimmerer
Somebody I used to Know by Wendy Mitchell
If the Buddha Married by Charlotte Kasl
Childhood's End by Arthur C. Clarke
Remarkably Bright Creatures by Shelby Van Pelt
The Fortunate Fall by Cameron Reed
Weaving Hope by Celia Lake
Alexandra's Riddle by Elisa Keyston
The Book of Love by Kelly Link
Surviving Domestic Violence by Elaine Weiss
Seaward by Susan Cooper
Very Far Away From Anywhere Else by Ursula K. Le Guin
Kitchens of Hope by Linda S. Svitak and Christin Jaye Eaton with Lee Svitak Dean
What It Takes to Heal by Prentis Hemphill
The Enchanted Greenhouse by Sarah Beth Durst
How We Show Up by Mia Birdsong
Currently reading "Hospicing Modernity" by Vanessa Machado de Oliveira Andreotti, which is a down-to-earth, practical manual on how to expand past the limitations that modernity puts on our thoughts, imagination, and experiences. The author talks directly about how difficult it is to address people's frozen assumptions without triggering defensiveness, while encouraging the reader to open up, side-step defensiveness, and explore wider possibilities.
I just got past the introductory exercises, which feel similar to the trauma-healing work I've been doing all this time. I always feel like I'm behind, trying to catch up to people who had more ordinary and loving childhoods but maybe those aren't so ordinary, and maybe all that work leaves me in a more flexible place.
Highly recommended! You can read a couple of sample chapters at decolonialfutures.net/hospicingmodernity
Story! Yuletide recs
Dec. 29th, 2025 07:27 pma knock at your front door by egelantier, Chalion Saga, World of Five Gods - Lois McMaster Bujold. Five Gods in modern times. Vividly written, highly recommended.
The long way out of a dark tower by Enigel, The Tower at Stony Wood - Patricia A. McKillip. I'm a longtime McKillip fan for the RiddleMaster of Hed series and Forgotten Beasts of Eld, and I thought I had read everything she wrote, including this one, but the characters didn't sound familiar at all. I'll have to go back and find it. Anyway, you don't have to know canon, lovely story.
The long way out of a dark tower by Enigel, The Tower at Stony Wood - Patricia A. McKillip. I'm a longtime McKillip fan for the RiddleMaster of Hed series and Forgotten Beasts of Eld, and I thought I had read everything she wrote, including this one, but the characters didn't sound familiar at all. I'll have to go back and find it. Anyway, you don't have to know canon, lovely story.
Don't let the door hit you on the way out
Dec. 28th, 2025 08:47 pm2025 but pictured in gingerbread. Amazing art.
International commerce
Dec. 27th, 2025 04:26 pmOn the mundane side, I ran across FlossGrip a while ago via network, and it sounded like a good idea, but the website is very 90's and I was dubious about ordering internationally, even with PayPal's guarantees. I went ahead and ordered in late October, and received a confirmation email saying I should receive it in 10 days, 30 days at the most. 30 days later had received nothing, so I wrote and asked about next steps.
The proprietor and inventor Gui wrote back and said he could ship again, or I could have a refund. Since I didn't know what went wrong and if it would go any better the next time, I opted for a refund, and got it quickly. Yesterday, almost two months after ordering, it showed up in the mail!
I wrote back to Gui and asked how to pay him again, since I now had the item. I ended up placing another order and paying for it, with the understanding that he wouldn't send anything. He said, "Ps: you are really a lovely person; I can tell you it’s not all the clients who are reacting the way you do."
All I did was pay for goods received, but it's nice to be reminded that my efforts to be a good person do succeed and do make a difference, since it's the mistakes that usually echo in my head.
(I tried out the FlossGrip this morning and it indeed uses much less floss, but it was awkward to use. Maybe I'll get better at it.)
The proprietor and inventor Gui wrote back and said he could ship again, or I could have a refund. Since I didn't know what went wrong and if it would go any better the next time, I opted for a refund, and got it quickly. Yesterday, almost two months after ordering, it showed up in the mail!
I wrote back to Gui and asked how to pay him again, since I now had the item. I ended up placing another order and paying for it, with the understanding that he wouldn't send anything. He said, "Ps: you are really a lovely person; I can tell you it’s not all the clients who are reacting the way you do."
All I did was pay for goods received, but it's nice to be reminded that my efforts to be a good person do succeed and do make a difference, since it's the mistakes that usually echo in my head.
(I tried out the FlossGrip this morning and it indeed uses much less floss, but it was awkward to use. Maybe I'll get better at it.)
Songs to sing
Dec. 26th, 2025 08:28 pmI've been getting together with a friend to sing for a couple of years now. We met in the Balkan choir and both have aspirations to sing in a trio again someday. She generally sings low and I generally sing high, although it's fun to swap sometimes. We haven't been successful at finding a third person to sing middle with us, but we've enjoyed practicing choir songs and learning other songs together.
I tend to like song with strong rhythms and melodies, and she tends to like the slow wandering songs with lots of ornamentation, so it's been broadening both of our repertoires. Here are a couple of songs I've been working on at her suggestion.
Zora Zazorila "Dawn is breaking". Here is Eva Quartet sounding fantastic. I listen to them and despair, because I will never ever sound like that, but I can sing my own version, with my own slower and simpler ornaments. Zora Zazorila sheet music
Bozha Zvezda "Lord's star". Here is Kitka singing it on their Wintersongs album, Leslie Bonnett gorgeously singing melody with Janet Kutulas. Bozha Zvezda sheet music
They learned it from Daniel Spassov, and here's his recording. Bozha Zvezda
Those songs are both Bulgarian, but in case anyone is interested in learning more about Balkan singing, Dragi Spasovski is a kind and knowledgeable teacher of Macedonian songs, and he's teaching online for EEFC four Wednesdays in January, 5-6:15pm PT. I just signed up! More info and registration.
I tend to like song with strong rhythms and melodies, and she tends to like the slow wandering songs with lots of ornamentation, so it's been broadening both of our repertoires. Here are a couple of songs I've been working on at her suggestion.
Zora Zazorila "Dawn is breaking". Here is Eva Quartet sounding fantastic. I listen to them and despair, because I will never ever sound like that, but I can sing my own version, with my own slower and simpler ornaments. Zora Zazorila sheet music
Bozha Zvezda "Lord's star". Here is Kitka singing it on their Wintersongs album, Leslie Bonnett gorgeously singing melody with Janet Kutulas. Bozha Zvezda sheet music
They learned it from Daniel Spassov, and here's his recording. Bozha Zvezda
Those songs are both Bulgarian, but in case anyone is interested in learning more about Balkan singing, Dragi Spasovski is a kind and knowledgeable teacher of Macedonian songs, and he's teaching online for EEFC four Wednesdays in January, 5-6:15pm PT. I just signed up! More info and registration.
Story! Happy Yuletide
Dec. 25th, 2025 08:10 pmI don't know canon, but I loved this story.
Halfway to Sky by bookwyrm in Almost Brilliant (Singing Hills Cycle) by Nghi Vo. "Up in the hills there was a goatherd, who could spin the dark out of the sky or the soft light of stars."
The comments at the end of the story are delightful too.
Halfway to Sky by bookwyrm in Almost Brilliant (Singing Hills Cycle) by Nghi Vo. "Up in the hills there was a goatherd, who could spin the dark out of the sky or the soft light of stars."
The comments at the end of the story are delightful too.
Story! All That Means or Mourns
Dec. 24th, 2025 10:01 pmAll That Means or Mourns by Ruthanna Emrys. I really love how Ruthana Emrys thinks about community and connection and the natural world. "Transformed by a broad-spread fungal infection that connects humans with nature, one woman feels closer to the world than ever, but further from the people she loves the most…"
PSA: California PG&E baseline allowances
Dec. 23rd, 2025 07:58 pmIn August 2024, I got a heat pump and switched my heat source from gas to electric.
PG&E has an arcane cost structure where not only do they charge more for electricity between certain hours (4-9pm for my rate plan) but they also have a baseline allowance and charge significantly more for usage over baseline. Neither the contractor nor my neighbor with a heat pump advised me that I needed to call PG&E and tell them I had changed heat sources to change my baselines, so I overpaid a lot for electricity last winter.
I was aware that I was paying a lot even though the heat pump wasn't maintaining temperature. I asked the contractor. I asked my neighbor. Neither mentioned the baseline amounts.
PG&E sent me a message earlier this fall saying I might pay less on a different rate plan, and when I called them (Oct 9, for my records), I found out about notifying them I now had electric heat. One agent told me the was refundable as much as 3 years retroactively, but it turns out he was blowing smoke, and it isn't. :-(
The new rate plan is even more complicated and I still had a really high bill this month despite not keeping the place very warm (and I have double pane windows and everything!), so I spent a long time on the phone with an agent today digging into the numbers and figured out the new rate plan is actually slightly more expensive than just having the right baseline amount, so I'm switching back.
*sigh*. I guess some lessons are just expensive. Looks like they instituted this whole baseline thing right around when I moved back in May 2022, which explains why I wasn't aware of it before, and maybe I missed both the existing customer education and the new customer education.
( Last year's missing baseline credits )
I'm continuing to send updates to the contractor who installed the heat pump system, which is under warranty for 3 years. At the end of last winter, he replaced the thermostat, and a control board in the downstairs indoor unit where he cut a jumper that it didn't make sense to cut. Now he says he's going to replace the whole indoor unit, and install one that's more powerful. It's supposed to arrive early-mid January. We'll see if that fixes the problem. He will also have to replace all the coolant, so if he had the wrong amount in there, that will also fix that problem. I suppose if that doesn't help then he replaces the outdoor unit. One step at a time...
PG&E has an arcane cost structure where not only do they charge more for electricity between certain hours (4-9pm for my rate plan) but they also have a baseline allowance and charge significantly more for usage over baseline. Neither the contractor nor my neighbor with a heat pump advised me that I needed to call PG&E and tell them I had changed heat sources to change my baselines, so I overpaid a lot for electricity last winter.
I was aware that I was paying a lot even though the heat pump wasn't maintaining temperature. I asked the contractor. I asked my neighbor. Neither mentioned the baseline amounts.
PG&E sent me a message earlier this fall saying I might pay less on a different rate plan, and when I called them (Oct 9, for my records), I found out about notifying them I now had electric heat. One agent told me the was refundable as much as 3 years retroactively, but it turns out he was blowing smoke, and it isn't. :-(
The new rate plan is even more complicated and I still had a really high bill this month despite not keeping the place very warm (and I have double pane windows and everything!), so I spent a long time on the phone with an agent today digging into the numbers and figured out the new rate plan is actually slightly more expensive than just having the right baseline amount, so I'm switching back.
*sigh*. I guess some lessons are just expensive. Looks like they instituted this whole baseline thing right around when I moved back in May 2022, which explains why I wasn't aware of it before, and maybe I missed both the existing customer education and the new customer education.
( Last year's missing baseline credits )
I'm continuing to send updates to the contractor who installed the heat pump system, which is under warranty for 3 years. At the end of last winter, he replaced the thermostat, and a control board in the downstairs indoor unit where he cut a jumper that it didn't make sense to cut. Now he says he's going to replace the whole indoor unit, and install one that's more powerful. It's supposed to arrive early-mid January. We'll see if that fixes the problem. He will also have to replace all the coolant, so if he had the wrong amount in there, that will also fix that problem. I suppose if that doesn't help then he replaces the outdoor unit. One step at a time...
