Word of the Year: Solace
Dec. 24th, 2017 05:36 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
soniaThis year's word of the year has been solace. I knew when I chose it that there was a lot underneath that I didn't have words for yet.
Solace for the political situation, yes. That has only become more necessary. But also, solace from the emotional pain of being in a relationship where I wasn't seen or truly wanted. Solace in that case has included ending the relationship, doing a bunch of processing, and starting to breathe a little easier.
Solace for political pain has included a year of monthly donations and, lately, pulling back from following details of bad news.
The world has always had more wrong with it than I could fix, and I have always looked to the circle I could reach with my hands to make things better. I'm reaffirming that that is what works for me. I suppose I reach a wider circle with my articles and books, and occasionally I get email telling me so.
I still feel defensive about needing solace, about not doing more, not doing differently, not making some huge dramatic gesture that makes a huge dramatic difference. I'm a healer, not a warrior. Protests aren't my thing. Part of solace is struggling toward peace with who I am and how I'm choosing to live in this complicated world.
There is an ongoing grief for the malicious unraveling of my country that still needs solace. I'll be keeping the word in mind going forward.
The word I'm choosing for 2018 is "care." I want to be cared about and cared for, and I also want to act with care, both caring and careful. I almost changed it to kindness, and that's in there too, but care is more active. As I said to my ex in our last conversation, you can have all the warm fuzzy feelings you want for your houseplants, but if you don't water them, they're not going to do well. Active care, tangible practical care.
Solace for the political situation, yes. That has only become more necessary. But also, solace from the emotional pain of being in a relationship where I wasn't seen or truly wanted. Solace in that case has included ending the relationship, doing a bunch of processing, and starting to breathe a little easier.
Solace for political pain has included a year of monthly donations and, lately, pulling back from following details of bad news.
The world has always had more wrong with it than I could fix, and I have always looked to the circle I could reach with my hands to make things better. I'm reaffirming that that is what works for me. I suppose I reach a wider circle with my articles and books, and occasionally I get email telling me so.
I still feel defensive about needing solace, about not doing more, not doing differently, not making some huge dramatic gesture that makes a huge dramatic difference. I'm a healer, not a warrior. Protests aren't my thing. Part of solace is struggling toward peace with who I am and how I'm choosing to live in this complicated world.
There is an ongoing grief for the malicious unraveling of my country that still needs solace. I'll be keeping the word in mind going forward.
The word I'm choosing for 2018 is "care." I want to be cared about and cared for, and I also want to act with care, both caring and careful. I almost changed it to kindness, and that's in there too, but care is more active. As I said to my ex in our last conversation, you can have all the warm fuzzy feelings you want for your houseplants, but if you don't water them, they're not going to do well. Active care, tangible practical care.
no subject
Date: 2017-12-25 05:42 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-12-25 09:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-12-26 09:58 pm (UTC)Amen! We -- the planet and all its residents -- need healers and warriors and leaders and followers and thinkers and doers and cooks and eaters.
and also, do you know the Irish super-group SOLAS?
https://youtu.be/xD_3CnaeCoM
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Date: 2017-12-26 10:18 pm (UTC)I think I've heard them before. In my hiatus from Balkan music, I collected a bunch of Irish music (possibly because they also play in 9/8, but divided differently). When I went over my collection, most of the bands were too rhythmically mushy for my tastes, but Solas is right on!