Speaking of "crazy"

[sonia]

I've been thinking about the word "crazy" and how I use it after I read Ableist Word Profile: Crazy at FWD/Forward.

Crazy is one of the most versatile and frequently used slurs, a word used sometimes directly against persons with mental disabilities (PWMD), sometimes indirectly against persons with able privilege, sometimes descriptive and value-neutral, and sometimes in a superficially positive light.

As a potter, I think of crazed glazes, run through with decorative cracks every which way, but leaving the pot fully functional. Or I think of a crazy quilt, another functional object with the same random lines.

Sometimes I think of crazy as meaning random, disorganized, running every which way, but still functional. Our modern usage of crazy as relating to mental illness comes from this original meaning.

Other times, I'm trying to briefly explain why I don't talk to my parents, and I say, "They're really crazy." They may be mentally ill, but that's not the point. I don't talk to them because they're cruel, and criminally abusive.

I also talk about avoiding "crazy people" in daily life, by which I mean people who initially seem friendly, but then it turns out they are too absorbed in their own drama to connect with me. Is that mental illness, or culturally programmed insensitivity? I'm not licensed to diagnose, so perhaps I'll say "inconsiderate" in the future.

Then there's "crazy-making" - when someone's words and actions undermine my connection with my own perceptions of reality. This comes closer to the mental illness definition, since that behavior leaves me in a mentally and emotionally disorganized state. I'm going to continue using that phrase. Rarely, I hope, since I back away immediately when I get that sensation.

Crazy-making is different from mere disagreement, and comes closer to mansplaining (I know I'm speaking clearly, why isn't this man responding appropriately?!), or gaslighting (wait, that's not how I remember it...).

I don't generally use crazy to mean extra, as in "crazy hot," and I don't intend to start now.

Thank you, RMJ for giving me food for thought and new awareness. I want to use "crazy" in a way that is respectful of people with mental illnesses, unless I'm talking about glazes, or quilts. As a side benefit, when I stop using "crazy" as a catchall word for inappropriate behavior, I can more precisely name what is really happening.

Photo credit:
Small Wheel-Thrown Vase, made and photographed by Zhao Shouren, photo published under Creative Commons License.

Comments

[onyxlynx]

Sometime in the last year or so I came to the same conclusions. It's an all-purpose catchall for both enthusiasm and behavior, and nobody (outside of the disability community and friends) gives it a second thought. (I am still gobsmacked by how often it pops up in thought, even though I've mostly gotten it out of speech and writing.)

It's really difficult to pinpoint that someone is exhibiting disordered thinking processes without characterizing her/him as mentally ill.

[sonia]

Good to know I'm not the only one.

I'm working on replacing, "That's crazy!" with, "That makes no sense!" I like "disordered thinking processes," but I'm not sure I'd be able to bring that out in the moment. Might be comforting in after-the-fact ruminations, though.

[jae]

Someone in my life recently brought this issue to my attention, and I've been thinking about it ever since. I'm trying to stop using 'crazy' (and 'nutty/nuts', a word that I love and am finding it much harder to part from), but am having a tough time of it.

I guess I think I'd find it easier if any of the things I've read that have asked people to stop using 'crazy' had proposed alternate terms that could imply the lack of judgment I tend to mean when I use 'crazy' or 'nutty/nuts'. I mean, in most other similar cases, problematic words tend to be replaced with other words; we don't just get asked to stop using words, period, you know? Can you think of good alternatives? Like, when I have referred to my "crazy neighbours," I mean that they make bad decisions stemming from poor judgment and lead generally kind of chaotic lives as a result. I'd love an alternative that had the same connotations without all the baggage!

-J

[sonia]

Hi! I've read and enjoyed some of your linkspams over time. Thanks for dropping by!

I think we can gradually notice and change one use at a time, rather than suddenly remove 'crazy' from our vocabulary. I'm finding that pausing and thinking of other words brings me more awareness of the situation I'm describing, even if I seem inarticulate as I search for a new phrase.

For your neighbors, it would depend on how and why you were mentioning them, but I like onyxlynx's suggestion above of "disorderly." Or, from your brief description, "unwise" might apply.

"Not reality-based" is one I use in the privacy of my own head when I'm questioning someone's reasoning processes. I'm not claiming the moral high ground on that one, but it does come closer to describing my problem with their behavior rather than armchair-diagnosing their mental health status.

[jae]

Hi back! I'm glad you like my linkspams--that makes me happy. :)

Hmm. Disorderly gets at some of what I mean about my neighbours, but that makes it sound like I'm criticizing how they live, rather than the bad judgments that lead them to live that way. And 'unwise' sounds too prissy (I mean, I have a tag on dreamwidth called "crazy neighbours", and changing it to "unwise neighbours" would sound reeeeeally ridiculous to me). I'll keep thinking about it, though.

I guess I prefer the efforts to change discriminatory language when there's an easy fix. ;) You know, like 'flight attendant' for 'stewardess' or 'chair' for 'chairman', or (in Canada) "First Nations" for "Indian". Easy!

-J

[sonia]

I think the easy fixes are already taken. :-)

How about "chaotic neighbours"? I got curious and went to look at what you'd listed under that tag, but it must be private.

[jae]

Ooh, that totally works! Thanks! I'm nabbing it. In fact, it's better than 'crazy'. Huh.

And yeah, it's not something I dare talk about in public. Wouldn't want the potential repercussions... :/

-J

[sonia]

Makes sense that those posts would be private, yes.

Glad it works! Thanks for the conversation.