With the brakes on

[sonia]

On the less successful side, I was asked to lead an exercise on implicit bias for another group, not the Narrative Medicine class, and I made it about the edge between knowing and not-knowing, awareness and unawareness. People did sit with the discomfort of that, yay them, but then I watched the leader flee back to the center of what she already knows.

My image is, I'm willing to lean my weight and push on something really heavy, but moveable. There's no point in breaking my heart leaning on something that has the brakes on. Time to let be.

Also the social dynamics were extremely weird and I felt very shaky and gaslit afterwards, unsure of my own perceptions, which likely means there was some gaslighting in the mix, and I for sure don't need that. I spent too long struggling with a relationship like that.

I suppose learning when to back off is its own kind of success.

Comments

[silveradept]

Knowing when to retreat is a useful skill. As is knowing when the brakes have been applied.

[sonia]

Yeah... My reverse gear doesn't work terribly well, but it saves some wear and tear when I use it at the right time.

[jesse_the_k]

Learning to back off is a huge success, especially around triggering topics.

[sonia]

Thanks! I'm still working on believing that fully.