Weird Pride

[sonia]

boxofdelights posted a thoughtful essay starting from Weird Pride Day by Oolong.

In comments there, jesse_the_k posted a link to a weird pride flag that's a geeky delight to behold.

As I said in a comment there, I kinda knew I was weird all along, but I thought it was just a matter of finding other weird people to hang out with. It's not until I got to Portland that being weird became a Problem, and maybe that's why I've never entirely felt settled here.

I don't know if I've gotten weirder over the years, or if the Bay Area just has more geeky people like me, or maybe a mix of both. I'm really excited to be visiting old friends there because it reminds me that I used to feel acceptable as a person and a friend.

My closest friend here in Portland has been my biking buddy who lived 3 blocks away. He and his wife got in their rented minivan today to start their move to Pittsburgh. I went over with my bike trailer to help them clear out the last of their stuff, and brought home anything they were too overwhelmed and short on time to deal with. Landline phones, glass recycling, their cat's large litterbox, a bag of trash, a container of sharps.

It was a small favor in my mind. Of course I do what I can to smooth their way on such a big move. Just like a handful of Bay Area friends came over to help me pack my kitchen back in 2005 when I was overwhelmed and running out of time.

My friends here were hugely grateful and said I was the only one who pitched in like that, and the only friend they saw regularly here. Another local friend said I was a good friend recently for giving her a gift to acknowledge her forced retirement from a beloved hobby for health reasons.

I'm realizing they're right. I am a good friend, in spite of or perhaps because of my weirdness. I've heard from many people over the years that Portland is a tough town to make friends in, and I want to keep remembering that it's not my fault that I've had such a rocky time with connections here.

(I wrote this Thursday and meant to post it yesterday, but something I brought in from my friends' house was so fragranced it permeated the whole house, which distracts me from anything not habitual or right in front of me. Fascinating in terms of brain function, annoying in terms of practical life function.)