Happy Pride Month, day 25, homeowner

[sonia]

25. I'm proud of being a homeowner. I bought a condo in Oakland at age 25, and only now looking back does that sound really young. There was a fortunate confluence of having a programming job, real estate prices not being as extreme as they are now (although they looked plenty extreme then), and a brief dip in the market.

I'm proud of having owned and managed a whole house and yard in Portland for 17 years. In the end it was deemed a "fixer-upper" because I hadn't done any major indoor renovations, but I replaced appliances and the roof and the exterior paint along the way. I took pride in being a good steward as best I could.

I'm proud of owning a condo again in Oakland a few blocks from the first one. It's a relief to have stepped down from a house to a smaller space, and while I eye houses when I go for walks, I'm not sure I want to own one again. We'll see what the future brings.

I'm grateful to the real estate agents that have guided me in buying and selling real estate along the way. I'm grateful that I was born long enough ago and have enough privilege and saved enough money to get into the real estate market on my own, without a partner or parental help. I'm grateful for the friend who suggested I consider buying, when I hadn't really imagined it.

The whole idea of real estate as an investment contributes to inequality, especially since it is applied in racist ways. I have bought in gentrifying areas and benefited from that. I live with the cognitive dissonance of understanding the inequalities of American capitalism, and still having to live within it.

Comments

[silveradept]

I try to reconcile how I ended up as a homeowner with how I have tried to use it as a place where people who would not be able to have their own dwellings can be, so that I am at least trying to use my privileged position for some kind of good.

[sonia]

Yes, that's a good way to share privilege.

I've done some of that in the past. And then sometimes I've realized that people I've tried to share with were actually using me. I know they're doing their best to survive, but it's painful to be seen as a stepping stone rather than a person. I'm glad to be in a smaller place where I feel less of an impulse to share the space.

[silveradept]

That makes sense. I managed to get out of a relationship where I was being used (and kept the house) and I don't feel like I'm being used by the people who are here now. I would like that to continue, frankly.

[sonia]

Yes, best wishes for that continuing!

[house_wren]

I am enjoying your posts about your (healthy) pride. Thank you. They are thought provoking and have led me to think about what I might include in a similar list. I like your writing and what you write about. Waving at you from afar.

[sonia]

Hi! *waves back* Thanks for commenting, and I'm glad you're enjoying the posts. I'd be interested to read if you decide to post a similar list. I've enjoyed writing them more than I expected, and I've been learning about what healthy pride feels like along the way.