sonia | Social Justice as a triggering topic

Chatting with a friend, I mentioned my recent epiphany about sexism. She said, "You're choosing to rendezvous with those experiences." I said, "No! That doesn't work for me!" Didn't raise my voice, but was emphatic.

She got very quiet and said I was silencing her and I was jumping on her every time she opened her mouth and she just didn't know what I wanted from her. I kept asking questions and finally I said, "It seems like something I said was triggering for you." She thought about that and said in the past friends have accused her of not caring about the world if she isn't fighting for social justice. She then noticed that I wasn't doing that and in fact I had been speaking about my own experience.

So we unraveled the conflict and ended on a good note, but it was educational to watch the conversation go completely pear-shaped just because I mentioned that it helps me to notice and name institutional sexism. This discrimination stuff is pernicious!